turn down the heater

did I sleep through spring? it is seriously hot outside. I taught coached swim at noon. I was the only one trying to get away from the sun. it's funny how after it's too late people try to protect their skin from the sun. my oldest triathlete was wearing sunscreen at our 6:30 am workout the other morning. it was cute. her skin looks great, though.
definitely going to have to do some reforestation. gave my 20 copies of my revisions to irb. I told the person I gave it to my proposal was about the destruction of the giant sequoia. he didn't think it was funny. the box was kind of sweaty, so maybe that's why he wasn't smiling.
thanks to help from dr miller made some serious progress in spss. now I just need to figure out exactly what procedure I want to use. it's interesting how easily that proposal got by irb when I had NO IDEA what I was doing. now that I do, they are micromanaging me. boo.
ran this morning at the same time marie ran. 5 min on/10 min off. I got some serious power walking in. leg and everything felt great during. I notice it, now, but on a 1-10 pain scale it's barely a 1. I just notice it. of course, the injury recovery schedule I found said do (10 walk/5 run)x2 and I did x4. I know, but I had already run some, so I wasn't really starting from scratch. going to swim at coach steve's in the morning. swimming outside at gre on thursday. then back at coach steve's on friday. if barton is open, supposed to go early on saturday. I am getting my IM on, again. finally I have a granny fly, again. I had lost it briefly.
well, I am going to head home and change out of this sweaty outfit into a different one.

quiet

it is great on campus today. quiet, cool outside, peaceful.
swam at gre outdoors with john.

WU 300 fr/300 kk/300 pu
4x75 fr/dr/fr
4x50 dr/fr
4x25 fr

I. 3x200 IM
300 pu
3x50 kk

2x200 IM
200 pu
2x50 kk

200 IM
100 pu
1x50 kk

CD 200 kk
200 IM ez

=4000 yds
the water was hot!!!
messing around with spss today. going to pt later. brad and I walked at the lake yesterday. I watched the second half of the spurs game and fell asleep. last night brad said he didn't realize he was married to a man. haha. a gay man trapped in a woman's body.

ups and downs

better today. played with spss a little this afternoon. entered grades. swam at the tsc this evening due to storm this morning. got up at 4:30. checked the radar. another one coming. back to bed.
lana left this afternoon. it's funny the way we both have separation anxiety. got to see my bf neil walker at the tsc. I gave him another b&m wedding water bottle to give to his wife. funny. I should give him some to give to his other Olympic gold medalist friends.
it was nice swimming for about an hour, then the governor (splashy mcsplasherstiff) got in next to me, and other people split with me. I am normally fine with splitting, but I was in the middle of a challenging set with a lot of fly. I tried to be nice eventhough I didn't feel nice. I wish I could tell the governor I have democrat tatooed on my left ventricle.
going to swim at barton in the morning with marie and justin. it was open today, so if it's not stormy in the morning we should be good to go. definitely going to a meeting in the other room tomorrow. the other thing I need to work on is on page 69 of my book (the 3rd edition).

WU 300 fr
300 k with fins fr/fly/bk
300 pu
8x75 fr/dr/fr

main set I got off mvm.org
building a 200 IM:
25 fly
50 fly
50 fly/25 bk
50 fly/50 back
50 fly/50 bk/25 br
etc up to 200 IM. it said :15R between each, but I took closer to :20 on most of those long ones.
:60R

then back down but thank God not all those 50 flys, again
200 IM
25 fly/50 bk/50 br/50 fr
50 bk/50 br/50 fr
25 bk/50 br/50
all the way down to 25 fr

there was another main set, but I was pooped.
cd was 300 k, 100 IM ez, 100 fr ez
=3700

ugh. sad

I am sad today. don't know why. maybe combo of mother leaving, classes over, brad is 100 million miles away. I liked these classes ok, but I think if I want to keep in touch with anyone, I will. there are a couple or three people. I feel like I was a spaz with my classes this semester. I guess I freak about all change. yet, I also get bored. trying to get in a place of graitude. there have been a lot of deaths around here lately. not people I knew, but once or twice removed. thank God we all have our health and some of us have our sanity. I guess most of the time I am fairly sane. I played water polo with my 2nd triathlon class. it was challenging and fun. it was funny though, because I didn't call turnover on touching the ball with two hands. the woman who was reffing while I was playing called it on everyone including me. it is hard not to do. I cannot do that egg beater kick, either. guess I need to practice. that is the first time I have ever played after teaching swimming for 4 years. I have really made a lot of progress in my swimming and teaching skills over the years. that is good.
get to go swimming in the morning if a tornado doesn't hit us tonight.

ga

I was feeling sorry for myself yesterday! Feeling more hopeful today. NPR is the great grateful maker.
Have you heard Steven Colberts' speech to WH press dinner? It was pretty awesome. Had a great and challenging swim this morning. 5200m!

WU 300 fr/kk by 50's with fins
300 pu
3x100 fr desc 1-3

4x[4x100 fast :20R, 2x50 ez :10R]
(All were around 1:38-9. That was good for me. We circled.)

100 IM
2x50 fly/fr
200 IM
4x50 bk/fr
400 IM
6x50 br/fr
(400 IM was slow, but not the slowest of all time. Not telling the time!!!)

400 pu ez

8x50 odds ez/build, evens ez/fast
200 ez

balance

I can see, now that I am coming out of the fog of the semester, once again, that I keep myself busy so that I don't feel my feelings. I think that I used to drink over being lonesome. I know I did. I see that I teach aerobics, have clients, teach swimming, teach triathlon class, work on my dissertation, exercise, there certainly must be more, to avoid sitting still.
I think I will try to see how I have made progress in this area rather than beat myself up about there I go again. Step 1 is quitting rec sports. Step 2 is saying no to a volunteer thing. Step 1 is teaching for Don Crowley. OK, fine, but it's only 2 mornings a week for 6 weeks. I do feel less lonesome than in the past end semesters. I think that other people struggle with this phenomenon. Maybe not in the academic year kind of way, but I hear that others work on balance. So, maybe it is one of those things like someone to pray for - something that I need God for. And probably some outside help, which I am getting. Haven't gotten to the other room, yet.

misc

having euphoric recall about being 21 and 22. I was not having a good time looking for the elusive, ephemeral drunken evening. yet, looking at people's facebook pics makes me compare my insides with their outsides. yes, it does look like fun, but I didn't ever have actual fun doing that. yes, it is titilating, but it was not fun to play games and try to be coy in the mating game. being hungover, blacked out, passed out, not fun. I never drank one beer in my entire life. even as a 12 year old. I also "dated" more than one dude. not fun.

swam 4500m this morning.

WU 400 fr/dr/fr/dr
300 pull
200 fr/dr
100 kick
50 fr

11x200
1-5 EZ
6-8 desc
9-10 holding 8 pace
11 all out

11x100 kick same as 200's

CD 150 not free

supposed to storm tonight and tomorrow morning.
we might swim in Barton in the morning if it isn't lightening.
found my buddy jonathan through google. get to meet his SON and visit with him and his wife next week.
wanted to reconnect with my old buddy stewart lupton. maybe I will put that out in the universe, too.

I ran I ran I ran I ran I ran I ran

and I felt good. it was fun. don't know how far. don't know exactly how long it had been. ran/walked with the jcaa tri ladies.
it was fun. I am happy.
yeah!

listening to music

had a yen to hear tom waits tonight. thought about jonathan cole. got to see him about 6 years ago, I guess, in dallas. met his wife whom he met in japan. wonder how he is. he and chesley. chesley and I literally slept together - slept in the same bed. ok, passed out. they came over for dinner one night with amy dreiss when I lived on enfield. I made spanikopita. I slept in chesley's bed another time. I met them through jennifer/grace and luke/curtis. what sophistocated, wild days. chateau neuf du pape or something like that. rolling drum tobacco cigarettes. listening to tom waits. reading henry miller. and eating at les amis. jonathan first told me about gillian welch. funny.
yes, I am up late!!!

too cold!

water was too cold this morning after all that rain. I was a big trooper and hung in for the whole workout. I never really got warm, though.
WU 4x100 Fr last 25 build
4x100 IM Dr Fly and Br

6x50 Fly K on bk arms down fins
6x50 Br Ez/Build
6x50 Bk K fins
6x50 Fr Ez/Build

3x(3x100 Fr descending 1-3, 2x100 Bk/Fr :10R!)
still cold!

CD
3x300 Pu all 5:05
still cold! but not cooled down because I was trying to stay warm.
oh, well

dad has been under the weather big time. I am assuming he is doing better because my mom hasn't called to tell me otherwise!
have clients this morning. going to office this afternoon. motivation=LOW
enjoying the rain. going to a meeting in the "other room" tomorrow. strongly suggested by several people.
I filled out a survey about social support the other day. I realized my jewish mom clients are probably the strongest source of social support because they all know how to talk about their feelings, and they all know how to hear me. they can be very objective because I am not their kid, and they have had lots of therapy. I was kvetching about them kvetching, but I really get a lot more from them than I give. supposed to go to the baseball game tonight. brad didn't seem like he wanted to go. he has a meeting that he doesn't remember what time it starts, and he doesn't know how long it will last. when I asked if he could ask his boss for an estimate of start/stop time, he seemed irritated.
insanity is doing the same things over and over expecting different results. I wish I knew how to do it differently. I am finally in enough discomfort about it that I am willing to try anything.
this semester I have noticed my controlling "tendency" (let's be gentle) with my students. this is somewhat adaptive because it's deep water, danger, etc, but I can see that I have a hard time finding a balance. this is one reason why I think I am afrad to have kids. how will I ever let go and yet still provide guidance. what a hard line to walk.
one client told me about mentoring a kid who has an incarcerated parent. wow. there's not much fine tuning, there. just show up and talk and play.

sit down to read this

From what I have heard on the news, I agree with Perry's budget plan.
Increasing cigarette tax, taxing businesses, these sound like the smart ideas of a democrat.
Reforming CPS, giving raises to teachers, again, ideas you would only think a democrat could come up with.
But, no.
I totally disagree with him on gay marriage, the death penalty, funding for prisons. But for the budget, his ideas make sense.
I know, it's weird.
Other reasonable Republicans: John McCain.
Yes, that is the end of the list.

circling

got in 5000m this morning. we circled. I am liking it. I am the middle speed. Chris is faster and Scott is slower. Scott is a sprinter, but is nice and let's me go 2nd even on the short stuff. Mark broke his collar bone.
I am REALLY feeling apprehensive about riding outside.

got to eat at Frank & Angie's with Stacy and Steve last night. they are both really liking their jobs. that is great news. I was anticipating more good news, but not yet....:)

students turned in nutrition lab. I am always amused by the alcohol consumption. amateurs. or underreporting. one person didn't underreport. I think I still could have drunk him under the table in the old days. all we need to find out is a keg of shiner and a time machine. thanks be to God I don't have to be 23 and under ever again.

WU 400 free
400 K fins
300 pu

I. 8x[(200)(100)(50)(25) in a row = all the 200's first, then all the 100's...] R:15 btwn the 8's, 2:00 between each leg. 1-2 moderately fast, 3-4 faster, 5-6=all out, 7-8 easy.
(effort level increased, but my 25's didn't change time much. that was funny.

II. 12x50 K fins. 1-3, 7-9 EZ/build, 4-6, 10-12 EZ fast

CD 300 EZ Pu

weezer

mac OS 10.4 has this feature called the wizzard. because brad is obsessed with weezer, I started calling it the weezer. last night we were having dueling weezers to see who had found cooler ones. he definitely had - a weather radar won. there is one that has a daily bible verse. I clicked on it and it was the verse that says that husbands should love their wives because it is similiar to the way jesus loved the church... so, I read that to brad. bible church goer that he is comes back with the one that says wives should submit to the husbands - that's the next verse. funny. good one, bh.
up early this morning. no reason. glad the tstorms passed so I can swim outside.
I swam on monday at the tsc. I was happy I stayed in the water as long as I intended and got a good workout. it was less hectic than trying to rush down to lc in between clients and teaching, so I think I will do that for the rest of the semester - about 2 weeks, I think!

attitude

things to be grateful for:
light holiday traffic
awesome parking spot due to holiday
no clients due to holiday
my own office with mood lighting and my own thermostat
all day npr on wbur
had a great swim

challenges:
construction noise!
MS Word/formatting this $%^& application

swim was
WU: 200 free
500 K with fins
200 dr/br

2x (100 fast, 100 mod, :20R. 2x50 EZ, :10R, 3x200 descending 1-3. 3 is all-out :20R) :30R between whole sets

8x50 fly K on back arms down, fins
6x50 br
4x50 free all out

CD: 2x300 pu dps
100 EZ
=4300

taking my guitar in to get it to play the correct notes all the way up and down the neck. don't know if that's possible, but worth a shot.
going to work until 4ish.
riding with marie in the morning. I hope she doesn't kill me. surely it won't be harder than riding with BRAD.

stolen

"When an alien lives with you in your land, do not mistreat him.
The alien living with you must be treated as one of your native-born.
Love him as yourself, for you were aliens in Egypt.
I am the Lord your God." - Leviticus 19:33-34

I stole this from another blog. It's a good one.

passover

Terry Gross had a duo on yesterday called "What I like about Jew." It was funny. They wrote a song that summarizes the Seder. "They tried to kill us, we survived, let's eat." We are not going to an official Seder this year, but I would like to have one at home. I am hoping I can find the ceremony online as well as the recipes. I'm not going to make the gefilte fish, but I will make some haroset and matzah ball soup. Mmm.
Swam this morning.
WU 200 free
400 fly kick on back arms down/free kick x 100's fins
200 pull
8x50 free kick EZ down, fast back

3x400 pull. :20 R There were 4 of us in the lane. Mine were all under 6:30. Group pressure, I guess
8x100 Fr with fins EZ/Build/EZ/Fast x 25's. :20R

300 IM
2 x 100 Fr
200 IM
2 x 100 Fr
100 IM
2 x 100 Fr
R:15! Ugh after the 300 IM

CD 150 Kick with Fins Bk/Fr/Bk
150 Swim with Fins Bk/Fr/Bk
100 EZ
=4800

Shoulder is a little irritated. Not going to swim tomorrow or Saturday, so I am not shooting to top the distance record, yet.
Saw a PBS thing on China last night. Really felt grateful that we can talk bad about our government and that they hear us, even through eavesdropping. As corrupt as it may be, we have it REALLY good. That is not an excuse to become complacent, but I also think I need to sit in a place of gratitude! Going to try to get some work done this afternoon after I teach and make myself stay until 7 to go to the Alderson lecture. I will not be wearing business attire. Oh, well.

saturday

swam 19,600 m this week. that is by far an all time high. I would guess that is close to an Olympian's daily workouts. 2x/day @ 10,000 m a time. the only other thing I did was ride about 40 miles, though. and teach 2 body sculpt classes.
went to part of the water polo tournament after swimming and riding this morning. team crush is back on. o, to be a piece of lettuce in a water polo team sandwich.
tomorrow is long day at the j. the spinning trouble maker has been at it with a vengeance. she is seriously getting prayed for.

http://amarillo.com/stories/040406/opi_4349180.shtml

A reasonable op ed from the amarillo paper.

yards are shorter

swam at gregory this morning. yards are shorter than meters. fast 100 free was 1:24. Still not 1:17. I have no idea how I ever did that. It was at the TSC with Justin pacing me. He was in the other lane, though - I wasn't drafting. I think I could have gone a second or two faster today, but not 7! Fast 100 IM was 1:39. It was extremely pleasant in there until about 7 am when everyone started coming in. I had seeded myself in the medium lane when I was the only one in the pool at 6. I figured that was not correct for gregory, but my paradigm is that I am medium.
DRC sent IRB to actual IRB so that I may get on the April docket. I didn't know I needed to provide IRB with 20 copies of my proposal. I just happened to email the DRChair and asked if there was anything else I needed to do now that she sent it through. It is very interesting, this whole thing. The NIH/OSP/IRB triumverate is an ironcurtain of red tape. Welcome to a life in academia. Are you ready? Go.
I plan on riding my trainer when I get home. Coach Steve told me swimming will help my running while I can't run. While I don't exactly believe that, I am really enjoying swimming right now, so I am going with it. Hopefully my lats will get huge.
800 IM

swim workout this morning. challenging. so challenging that I didn't quite make all the intervals.

WU 200 free
400 K fins
3x100 IM on :10R

4x100 on 2:00 fast turns
4x100 on 1:55 fast from flags
4x100 on 1:50 last 25 fast
4x100 on 1:45 strong/fast x 50's
all free. staying on the interval. the last 4 were essentially a 400 free as fast as I could go at that point

4x200 IM :30R

6x50 fly K on back arms down fins
6x50 breast K
6x50 back K fins
all on :10R

CD 400 pull, 100 choice.
=4700

Went back to the chiropractor this morning. It is funny the people I tell I am going either have a strong, categorical opposition to chiropractors, or they love this particular one because he helped them so much. He, himself was in a bike accident that almost killed him, almost lost his leg. Now he rides again and has won big races. Wow. No more complaining about 3 more weeks off running!