Saturday, October 28, 2006

black celebration

bh and I received our first used, retro cd purchase. I have already imported it to his itunes and put it back for sale on amazon. it was one I wanted - depeche mode - black celebration. I was listening to this album over 20 years ago. that is freaky. I suppose it gets freakier the longer one hangs around. I listened to the tape on my sony walkman about 100 times while riding with gary, judy, and cynthia coffman all over Germany. depeche mode are, of course, english. so, when I started singing, coupled with the fact that rhett miller sang with an english accent, I assumed one was supposed to sing using an english accent. in particular, when I sang depeche mode 'somebody' at the talent show in 9th grade, wearing a homemade tie-dyed tee shirt, my blue ten-hole doctor martens, a jean mini-skirt, and my egalitarian skinhead haircut, I sang it with an English accent. and one more thing, I played my classical guitar and finger-picked it using the Travis pattern.
I ran this morning long by myself for the first time in a long time. I listened to the end of morning edition and car talk. that was amusing.
I swam a lot yesterday. 6000 meters. I am an addict. more more more.
happy to see the signs for ba ba ba barbara ann radnofski and ted ankrum all through Brikerwoods, Tarrytown, and Pemberton Heights. the rich folks in Austin are Democrats.
someone needs to let barbara ann know, however, that the beach boys song the announcer refers to in her commercial is not BAR BAR BAR BAR BARBARA ann. it's ba. ba ba ba ba barbr ann. fyi.

Friday, October 27, 2006

force of good

bh and I had a very interesting discussion last night about the state of the world. interesting that my dad recently tried to convince me of the same thing. we decided that essentially good does triumph over evil, and that the world is progressing to a more and more enlightened and peaceful state. there are however, regressions towards evil such as the dark ages, the crusades, Hitler, Islamists, many more, I am sure. we agreed that women's rights took approximately 1000 years, black rights took 100-300 years, give or take your region, so certainly gay rights will not take even that long. the stonewall riots were in the late 1960's. it is no longer a social taboo to be gay. there are certainly hate crimes based on sexual orientation, but these have fortunately become fewer and farther between, and there is federal and state level legislation set up to prosecute those crimes.
I posited that all change is catapulted by crisis, much as internal, individual change is. bh said maybe gay rights won't even take a crisis. most young people favor gay marriage and think it is really stupid to legislate oppression.
I think that I do become sad and angry about things that happen in the world. recently, some mf arsonist started that fire in CA. firefighters dead. incredibly sad. many sad events.
however, I think I am so self-centered that any unhappiness or depression I feel is merely from self-absorption, and not from feeling sad about the state of the world. I think feelings about the state of the world are a necessary burden that engage people to take action to change things. I can see that change is a very constructive use of anger and disgust. I think the only reason I have ever changed anything was due to a crisis on some level.
meanwhile, I am trying to walk in the correct direction and do the next right thing.
I waited in line to check out at HEB for a good 15 minutes. I had great victory over impatience and read People. I didn't know Jen and Vince were on the outs.

Thursday, October 26, 2006


bh and I are bonding over the music of our youth. he downloaded a smiths album we have been listening to over and over. if we keep it up, however, we might reach clinical depression. ...let me let me get what I want, lord knows it would be the first time...
I also got out my records. it was cool to see them. we bought a little turntable to make mp3's from. very cool. sex pistols, depeche mode, violent femmes, the clash here we come.
I heard a musician interviewed the other day who mentioned that as music listeners we no longer have the visual stimuli records provided. she put pictures of herself dressed up in sexy outfits from the 1950's to address that void. still, cd pics are not nearly as cool as a big, fold-out record with all the liner notes, etc.
when cds came along, I never thought records would leave.
I was trying to remember college without a computer.
how did anyone ever write a dissertation??? they must have had 10-20 references instead of 100.
I am waitng on data from one more school. cannot make myself revise my actual proposal to reflect the changes. it's painful. I know I need to, I want to, I sit down, open it up, look at it, think about it, can't do it. tomorrow....
clients this afternoon 4-7, so I am going home for lunch, etc. yes, it's 1:20.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Chris Bell for Texas Governnor!

I am early voting for Chris Bell ASAP. He is eloquent, intelligent, and knows about state governmental processes. He is also pro-choice, anti-school voucher, pro-alternative energy. He is against gay marriage. Boo.
All the candidates are, however. I voted for him anyway and will bombard him with correspondence when he is elected.
#2 Civil rights and desegregation were once thought of as liberal ideas. I am now calling myself a moderate because the first step in making justice restorative, education effective, using stem cell research, gay marriage, alternative energy, women's rights, etc, etc, etc normative is viewing them as such.
This week, however, at the suggestion of dad, I am not listening to NPR.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

don't feel like it

I don't feel like doing ANYTHING which is good because Marie called at 6:15 to tell me she was too tired to run. I was 10% bummed/90% relieved. I don't have clients until 12:30 due to Sukkot. therefore I went back to sleep until 8:30 am! I know, I have really turned back into a teenager. swam at gre yesterday morning with some friends who are former swim students. then, we ate bagels. it was fun. girl time. I walked/ran at Town Lake on Thursday with another new gf. I never want to go before I go, but I am always glad during and after that I went. my mom and I talked about this the other day. I almost never want to begin an activity, particularly social ones, but once I get there, I am glad I did. very weird that experience cannot change that thinking.
BH and I went on a fun top-secret mission yesterday. not yet accomplished, but making headway. we also went by to pick up his refurbished bike he built that he needed some help putting the chain on. it's neat. he spent a lot of time sanding it and putting it together. it had been sitting outside up against the fence for over a year. it was inspiring.
this week will be pretty short because I am headed to big D to visit the family and go to the fair on Thursday. it is my one fried food/year. corny dog! I don't think I am going for a caramel apple this year. I like them, but the last one I got was not very good. the ones at senor murpy's in sante fe are the best caramel apples of all time.
I didn't enjoy watching most of the game yesterday. as I mentioned watching the tech/a&m game, it is easier to want texas' rivals to lose than it is to watch texas try to win. the second half was more pleasurable. ga. that was a lot of interceptions. brad came up with the hypothesis that the reason why people immediately focus on the next game or championship, instead of resting on the laurels of today's accomplishments, is that they, too feel anxious during the game, that there may not be victory. that is my #2 pet peeve about sports commentators. my #1 is that football coaches, players, and commentators rarely use the word, "ball;" they almost always say, "football." no shit it's a football; we are watching a football game. just call it a ball. we know what kind of ball it is. ga.
we also went to HEB during the first part of the game. it was interesting to see who was there - the punk rock kids, women, and many more black people than one normally sees at that HEB. that HEB is dominated by students of all colors, Latino families, and very few black people. we overheard a conversation that reminded me of a story Steve told me when he worked at a Pawn shop.
A young woman came in to the Pawn shop and was looking at rings. she looked for a long time and said, incredulously, "ain't you got no rings without no diamonds?" Steve thought about it for a minute, and then said, "yes ma'am, that is correct."

Friday, October 06, 2006


sick of tweaking my proposal.
went to steve's this morning. I kind of like not being chaffeur because I can stay as long as I want. water temp was PERFECT.
WU 200 Fr, 200 K, 400 Pu
6x50 Dr/Sw (Fly, Bk, Br) 2x on 1:10
6x50 EZ/fast Fr on 1:10

3x(3x50 desc 1-3 Fly, Bk, Br. 3 is all out and time it.) all on :15R
my Br was the fastest. FREAKY. I think I was about to cardiac arrest after 50 all-out fly at the end of 3 with :15R
each 3x50 followed by 300 EZ Fr. the slowest 300's of all time.

40x50 K
1-16=every 4th fast on :60
1-12=every 3rd fast on 1:05 on Bk
1-8=every other fast on 1:05
1-4=all fast on 1:05

CD 250 mix
back up to 5000 m. neat.

got a flu shot yesterday. not sore, really. was SUPER sleepy yesterday afternoon. could be unrelated. my eye is twitching indicating I am tired. I am going to veg tomorrow while I thoroughly enjoy watching the TXOU game.
going to seminar this afternoon. REALLY don't want to.
Brad REALLY didn't want to go to work today because everyone was complaining. I can relate. met with my 7 year old on Wednesday. it is cool. it is also cool not to have one with me all the time.