Dear Zeus (or whichever One of you does the weather),

Since we are having winter this year, can we please have fewer bugs, and in particular fewer mosquitos in the spring and summer?  Spring and fall would be as perfect as winter were it not for those blood-sucking mother mosquitos.

Had Uncle TH and Aunt JH down for the first snow I have ever seen stick to the road in Austin.  They did have 2.5 days of nice weather.  We felt guilty about the snow.  Silly.  HH LOVED having them down.  I can see how it takes a village...because Brad and I were so much more at ease having some backup.  I want another baby, too.  It is such a miracle that at almost 39 I have an infant and a three year-old.  What a great way to prolong getting "old."

I am trying to figure out ways to work from/at home so that I can generate income enough for Brad to go to nursing school.  I am going to try insurance companies for wellness coaches.  More writing possibilities.  Personal training at home.  Maybe yoga and pilates classes?  If training is during the day, people have to be cool with a baby (or two) around.  I feel much more at ease with caring for a baby while working.  Just feed it, burp it, or rock it.  Or, it might even just be sleeping.  With Hank I felt very unsure of what I would do depending on what he would do, and I had no idea what that might be.  All of my personal training clients are women.  The vast majority have kids and like being around a baby.  The drawback is, sometimes a crazy night leaves me stupid.  I fight the urge to nap and hibernate, but I'm not a good fighter.  Ideally, I would like to write more, but I realize it's not my turn to find ideally.  Just to find an economical use of my time and expertise while being able to care for young children.

BH and I have seen Judith Sokolow from Jewish Family Services 2x.  We have one more time to see her.  She has given us some practical communication skills.  Skills I learned in group therapy, but am out of practice with and can't practice in a vacuum.  I feel very hopeful.  I am determined to model adaptive communication for HH and CH.  Not perfect, but adaptive.
 
For some strange reason I am awake at 9:50 PM, and everyone else is asleep.  For some other reason I don't like being awake alone at night, but love it during early morning hours.  It's an artifact from my past life, but I wonder why, after 15 years of piety, it still feels yucky to stay up late.  I guess it's just OK to be no matter what time it is.  And it's OK to say, well, there you go, silly.

This morning I remembered that I would never say, "you are a big fatty," to anyone.  Even to a big fatty.  : )  So, why would I say that to myself?  I am feeding a baby.  I am 11 weeks post-partum.  It doesn't matter what any other mother looks like at this stage of post-partum.  As long as all the parts are working, that's all there is.  That's what is to be grateful for.  Thank you.  It is such a gift to care for an infant.  So amazing and impossible to reciprocate.

Middle of the Night Poems (Mostly Hokey)

I don't remember the format for Haiku, and these are not, but I did try to stay to an odd number of syllables per line. 

1.
I gave up
books I left open
stayed unread
missing the person
who are you

2.
loving the winter
cloudy skies
capillaries of the trees
sanctuaries now revealed

3.
a hermit
facebook is my New York Times
always something worth reading
keeping up with how you are
all of you

4.
then
late night hours
I was always up
lacking peace
lost

5.
never thought
angel face
precious time
speeds away
so holy
divine kiss
always loved
my two sons

Letter from Lloyd

I'm on Lloyd Doggett's email list (Lloyd's List).  The last email he sent, I replied with something along the lines of, "You are so awesome.  I love you!"  And, those things are true, but I assumed the email would either bounce back, go to spam, or at least go unread.
Nope, not my Lloyd.  He sent me this letter AND a 2011 calendar from the US Capitol Historical Society.  My home address wasn't on my email AND I'm not even in his district, anymore.  Lloyd Doggett is so awesome and I do love him!

Persisting Health Disparities

I've been working on the railroad!

Five Little Monkeys Song with Finger Puppets | Children music & nursery ...

I find this rendition to be very disturbing.

Looks like we made it

I always sang that song in my head coming off the last hill of the dam loop. I don't miss that ride at all.
HH, CH, and I made it through 2 weeks of home alone for long stretches. This well was smoother, but still a challenge.
I usually write on Dec 23. This year is my quinceneira. I was sick and worn out last week. I am going to try to get a chip this weekend.
Wish I could go to Go Dance NYE party. It was $25 in advance. I asked for a nondrinker discount, and they said no. A nondrinker and stay about an hour. Probably fine to stay home, rest, and steer clear of the amateurs.
I'm using my iPod touch, which I call an itouch, just to be annoying, but anyway the touch screen is acting a little weird.
I am still hacking up and blowing out gunk from my sinus infection-over 2
weeks. The worst is not getting enough sleeps due to cough. I always get this cough and have to beg for guaffinessin with codeine-one of the 1st cough meds and the only one that works for me. Just suffering. I wish docs understood some patients are not idiots and can use deductive reasoning if nothing else to diagnose themselves. Oh, well.
I'll stop, now, because the keyboard is being weird

Louis CK and Unvacation

I saw a John Stewart interview with Louis CK about his FX series.  He is hilarious.  Reed used to tell me he thought Bill Hicks was his soulmate.  I feel this way about Louis CK.  He is so sweetly irreverent.  I was talking with a dad at Ramsey whose red-headed son was playing with Hank, and I mentioned Louis CK.  He also found him hilarious and also found others didn't get him.  I have tried to explain a few bits to Brad, but I admit, make Louis CK sound mean or raunchy, or just not funny.  I clearly, though I like to think I am, am not a comedian.  I don't have the timing or delivery necessary.  The entire FX series is on instant netflix.
I also recently saw a Dave Chapelle standup routine.  He discusses the ridiculousness of women in women's magazines giving advice about men.  E.g., 100 ways to please your man, written by a woman.  He said there were only 4 ways, and I paraphrase, "perform oral sex, something else related to oral sex, make him a sandwich, and don't talk so much."  I love that.  Although, I don't think that describes Brad.  But, maybe I have read too many women's magazines.

Hank, Charlie, and I have been home, alone together for the past week and a half (except for the hours of 5-8:30 am several weekdays and Sunday mornings).  I think Hank has done well with the transition of the addition of a huge attention stealer.  He has regressed, I guess for lack of a better description, in some emotional expression.  He has made progress verbalizing his want for attention or disturbance simply with the change in the game.  Last week, I thought a lot about the Calgon, take me away commercial.  It felt like an all day crisis management, and I was sick, and didn't feel well,  and sleep deprived, etc.  This week, after getting 2.5 days home with me and Brad, he has done much better.  He still has a few teary meltdowns when I deny him candy or going to the store to buy more toys, or something like that.  It is SO sad the expression on his face when he cries.  I want the instant gratification, I suppose, of entertaining his want for instant gratification.  I keep reminding myself that just because he cries when he asks for candy, and he has already had more than I intended to give him for the day, that I am not helping him by giving him more candy.  A cocaine addict would cry for more cocaine, and that doesn't mean they should be given more cocaine.  And not that Hank has developed an eating disorder or something like dependence, it is my job to be the self-regulation that he cannot yet provide for himself.  The fact that he even eats candy is not what I had intended for him.  Other parents tell me their kids would eat candy all day everyday if they let them.  Some parents have managed to keep their kids away from candy altogether.  The other day, he was eating some reese's peanut butter cups and said, "I love this candy."  He said it with the same sweetness he uses when he says, "I love you," to me.  He sometimes says, "I love you, too, mommy," as the initial statement.  It is so sweet.  This morning I was so sleepy, and he was waking me up by kissing my face.  It was funny, but also SO sweet.  I hope I will be recovering next week with some seriously long naps.

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Xmas2010

Stewards

I heard a long time before I considered having children that parents are stewards of their children. We don't "own" our children, and the point of having children is not to have children, but to ultimately have more adults. Merge those thoughts with a more zen approach of mindfully enjoying each day. Charlie was born last Sunday night after a very short active labor (9-11 pm), lots of the f word, exclamations that I was pooping, and that I could not, in fact, continue to give birth. The nurse midwife, L&D nurse, and Brad gave me enough encouragement that Charlie did come out, weighing 7 pounds, which seems like a lot, but Hank only weighed 5 pounds, 10 ounces. So, here I am at 5 am, feeling totally hormonal, hungry, and freezing. I was freezing, I think from becoming slightly dehydrated during the night making the 2 tanker trucks of milk I am now schlepping around. I am happy to provide free food for the kid.
The other night, after putting Hank to bed, I got so weepy that he is already huge, and mad at myself for not staying in the zen, daily and minutely moments more often, and overwhelmed by feelings of how much affection and love I have for these people. Even for Brad, although he hasn't changed, I feel more love towards him as I see him being a dad. [As I am feeling hyper-emotional, I can feel my mammary glands topping off what were already overly-full tanks. Hormones are powerful substances. More powerful than synthetic drugs]. My point was that I don't want to overwhelm Hank and Charlie with my extreme and intense feelings. Brad can take it, so he may get overwhelmed. And the extreme emotions that accompany pregnancy and birth are adaptive in that they require a slowing down and promote mindfulness to enjoy every feeding and every burp. And the only thing truly required is to channel the love I feel into spending time with them doing what they want to do. Play with cars, legos, go to the playground, etc. And model being a decent human being. Providing direction and how the world works will not just come from me, and I don't think that is my primary purpose with them. I know I have heard in meetings, "God doesn't have grandchildren." That makes sense to me. I can't even get near the line approaching not having them in my life, but that thought is slightly less overwhelming if I think of caring for them on Earth in a way that God might care for them. Or at least that being the goal. I have been loaned them as a gift to stay with me until they are adults and will hopefully get to enjoy them well into their adulthood.

Slightly different subject, St. David's kicks Seton's ass so badly. My ob's practice at the Renaissance Women's Health Facility by St. David's North Austin Medical Center. a) I LOVED all the practitioners: 3 ob's, 2 nurse midwives, 2 nurse practitioners. One of the nurse midwives delivered Charlie. She was so awesome. b) the food was awesome. I made myself french toast this morning (with Hank's challah, no less) because I had had 2 awesome servings of French toast during my stay. They had a menu from which you could choose and order to be delivered at a time you wished. Awesome. c) The postpartum care was awesome. Adequate pain management, competent nursing staff, a comfortable room, which Hank called, "the hotel." I'll give Seton this, the food was OK, although I didn't get to pick what I wanted. Getting pain med was more like begging. I found the refrigerator sooner at Seton and was able to feel less like a lazy bum asking for water and crackers and stuff. I found the kitchen at St. David's the day we left, and actually, Brad found it. St. David's had locks on many of the kitchen cabinets, which I thought was kind of mean to taunt postpartum ladies with. I also had WAY fewer stitches this time, so getting around and up and down was SO much more manageable. I mostly had cramps when nursing, and achyness in my abs and low back. NOTHING like the wad of stitches I was sitting on after Hank was extracted from me by the male OB I didn't know at Seton. I know, a little dramatic, but, the more I consider it, the more I feel disempowered by that place and their practices. I know it's ultimately irrelevant. Got healthy Hank home, but why not leave the hospital with a beautiful feeling rather than feeling like we had to take Hank and run away from Seton at the first opportunity.
Anyway, postpartum day 7, I want one more baby. And no, I am not going to think about how unpleasant the pregnancies have been for me. Every pregnancy is different. The next one could be much worse. haha. I actually would like to be Angelina and Brad, if we had the nannies they have, also. But that is kind of lame. Why delegate part of child-rearing to strangers? If we had an aunt or some slightly older relative living with us who could aid in the care, I would be cool with that. When I am tired and don't feel like playing with legos, I want Brad to play with legos with him. I don't want Hank to miss out on playing with legos, but I realize it is not very motherly to delegate. I KNOW this is all a balance, and one has to bathe, brush one's teeth, EXERCISE, which I cannot believe how long it has been since I have done formal physical activity. I am going to do some right this second!!!

The Problem with Us is Them

The American Psyche is crippled, if not paralyzed, by the constant self-declarations and designations of "us" and "them." In fact, there need not be a "them" in American politics, at least not if "we" truly want to change the absurd, and largely impotent, system of partisan politics. It would be political suicide for a lone or even a few Republican congressmen to accept President Obama's reach across the aisle, even if their convictions permitted. President Obama, although he can and has acted by example, cannot suddenly change the efficacy of Congress. Popular media vilify rogues, and the voters follow. The only way to change the system, what George Saunders eloquently dubbed, the "braindead megaphone," is to change our behavior. And behavior change requires a complete mutiny and damnation of the manner by which Congressional progress has eked along and been perceived since its inception. Early in our history, it was probably adaptive for us to have "us" nearly Americans and "them" English royalty. And, we made progress away from a monarch, house of lords, and unrepresented taxation. Yet this setup, like our Puritanical heritage has been toxic to preserve. Less than 100 years after we became we, we divided ourselves into us Southerners and them Northerners. I do not expect or even hope to find a consensus on most issues in American politics, however, digging into convictions of sound bites to defend "our side" leaves us stuck in a country full of ruts. I fantasize about a future in which we might regard "us" as earthlings, or even wilder, "Spirits of the Universe," all on the same team. But, I would be so thrilled if we started with "us" Americans, and truly pursued life, liberty, and happiness, not for ourselves, but for our fellow citizens, our only foe being divisiveness.

In What Organs Are Enzymes Found That Break Down Food?

This title was requested and the article was rejected. Boo.

The digestive system is one of seven bodily systems requiring complex pathways and hormonal signaling.

The digestive system is one of the seven bodily systems and is a beautifully orchestrated, complex collaboration of organs producing appropriate enzymes in response to a stimulus, eating! Digestive enzymes are produced throughout the body and have the ultimate purpose of making glucose available for every cellular process in the body.

Catabolism

The process of digestion is catabolic. You are probably familiar with anabolic steroids, which aid in the process of building muscle. Catabolism is the opposite process, a breaking down of complex food structures into smaller, usable molecules, such as glucose. You may remember from high school science class that sugars usually end in the suffix, –ose, e.g. lactose. The enzyme, usually ending in –ase, is associated with catabolizing the nutrient. In the case of lactose, lactase catabolizes lactose into glucose and galactose, making a larger molecule into two, simpler and smaller molecules.

Digestion is initiated in the mouth, which produces amylase.

The semi-permeable mucous membrane in the mouth makes saliva, which contains amylase, the first enzyme required to digest food. The semi-permeability of mucous membranes allows for secretion of amylase and absorption of some substances, glucose included, in the mouth. A science experiment you can try at home: put a saltine cracker in your mouth. Do not chew it; simply begin to let it dissolve. At first, the cracker tastes salty, but soon seems to melt into smaller particles. Because of amylase in your mouth, after a few seconds, the cracker now tastes sweet.

Mechanical Digestion in the Stomach

The stomach produces the enzyme, pepsin, and signals the gall bladder and pancreas for bile and insulin, respectively.

The enzyme produced by the stomach is pepsin, which begins to catabolize proteins, e.g. meat. Signaled by the stomach being filled with food, the gall bladder produces bile, which is secreted into the stomach. Thirdly, the pancreas is signaled by the stomach to produce insulin, a complex molecule composed of several enzymes. Insulin is employed in every cellular process of the body to bring glucose into the cell. Insulin is also absorbed into muscle, liver, and brain tissue for the utilization of glucose. While the stomach is often regarded as where digestion occurs, the primary function of the stomach is to mechanically digest food by using the muscles and digestive acids to begin to ready food to pass into the small intestine.

Where the Real Work is Done

The small intestine is the primary organ of nutrient absorption and contains, lactase, disaccharides, and several peptidase enzymes. Insulin and bile used in the stomach also pass into the small intestine. Most of the nutritional value of food, the carbohydrate, fat, and protein components, as well as vitamins and minerals are absorbed into the bloodstream by the small intestine. The remaining fluid and waste products pass into the large intestine, and needed water is absorbed there. Intestine trivia for you: From the beginning of the small intestine from the pyloric valve at the emptying end the stomach to the end of the large intestine is about 13 feet in an adult. If you would like to know more of the gory details about the cellular processes involved in constructing the enzymes, hormonal regulation, and interactions of feedback and feedforward mechanisms between bodily systems, Dee Silverthorn, Ph.D. is a prominent human physiologist and has written several, excellent and thorough textbooks.

From the Top to the Bottom

This ordered list sums digestive organs and their enzymes:
Mouth-amylase
Stomach-pepsin
Gall Bladder-bile
Pancreas-insulin
Small Intestine-lactase, disaccharides, peptidases

Keywords

• Sugar and Enzymes
• Digestive Organs
• Digestive Enzymes
• Glucose and Insulin
• Cellular Processes

Reference

• NIH: Your Digestive System and How It Works [http://digestive.niddk.nih.gov/ddiseases/pubs/yrdd/]
• American Dietetic Association: How Insulin Works [http://www.eatright.org/Public/content.aspx?id=6818]
• Human Physiology Textbooks [http://www.aw-bc.com/silverthorn/]

Nutritional Snacks for ADHD Children (Rejected Article)

Nutritional Snacks for ADHD Children

Credit: Dimitri Vervitsiotis/Digital Vision/Getty Images

Keeping your child's energy level constant facilitates learning.

While behavioral and pharmaceutical therapy may be at the center of your child’s Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder treatment, providing nutritious snacks may also be beneficial. According to the National Institute on Mental Health, eating large amounts of sugar does not cause ADHD, but an appropriate diet should focus on foods and snacks with a low glycemic index, foods that do not results in a dramatic rise and fall in blood glucose.

Foods with Low Glycemic Indeces

Children with ADHD lack the ability to focus, which may result from a lack of stimulation. Low glycemic index foods, particularly for school and as after-school snacks, prevent the spike in blood glucose that would promote hyperactivity, and the following drop in blood glucose, making attention wane. Foods low in glycemic index are usually high in fiber, and/or also contain protein or fat. For example, white bread has a higher glycemic index than does whole grain bread. The fiber and protein from the whole grains slow the rate at which the stomach empties into the small intestine and therefore slows the increase in blood glucose following the meal or snack. The following are examples of low-glycemic index foods: all legumes, all leafy greens, all dried beans, most fruits (dried fruits are higher in glycemic index), whole grain breads, pasta, brown rice, quinoa, sweet potatoes (twice baked with a little butter and cinnamon are a special treat, ice cream, and nuts.

Credit: Peanut Butter01 image by Platinum Pictures from Fotolia.com

Adding protein to carbohydrate lowers the glycemic index of the carbohydrate. A traditional peanut butter and jelly sandwich can be much healthier with a few changes. Use whole grain bread, jelly or jam with no added sugar, just pureed fruit, and natural peanut butter with no sugar added for the lowest glycemic index sandwich.

Add Fat

Credit: cheese image by carol lynch from Fotolia.com
Cheese contains protein and fat, both lowering the glycemic index.

Adding fat, preferably mono- or poly-unsaturated fat lowers the glycemic index. Regular or reduced calorie cheese on top of the legumes and beans or in addition to the fruit make the fruits and vegetables more filling and more appealing. For example, black beans with brown rice, cheese, tomatoes, and avocado, is a very filling and tasty snack. Homemade pizza on whole wheat crust with no sugar added pasta sauce, mozzarella cheese, and pineapple, lean meat, and vegetables is also filling, tasty, and has a low glycemic index.

Eat Whole Foods

Credit: abstract,sign.organic fresh beet . food ,vegetable image by L. Shat from Fotolia.com

Although they are high in convenience, most processed foods tend to be higher in glycemic index the further they differ from the form in which they are grown. For example, apple juice is much higher in glycemic index than is an apple. Chips and crackers are higher in glycemic index than are brown rice and whole grain bread. The American Dietetic Association has a website with tasty, low glycemic index recipes (eatright.org). The American Diabetes Association has useful information about glycemic index and creative ideas for alternatives to traditional foods. A desirable diet for a diabetic does not differ much from a desirable diet for someone with ADHD.

Explaining Performance Foods

Credit: mother and daughter conversation image by Allen Penton from Fotolia.com

Sometimes children understand more than we give them credit for. If you are making a radical change in the snacks you prepare, tell your child why. He/she is already aware that there is an attention problem, and is likely frustrated. Explain in an age-appropriate manner that low glycemic index foods keep his/her blood sugar more constant, are not a punishment, but a performance enhancement, and are designed to make him/her the best kid he/she can be.

Keywords

• Low Glycemic Index
• Whole Grain Carbohydrate
• Performance Foods
• Brain Food
• Blood Glucose Regulation
• ADHD Diet

Reference

• American Diabetes Association: Low Glycemic Index Foods [http://www.diabetes.org/food-and-fitness/food/recipes/?utm_source=WWW&utm_medium=DropDownFF&utm_content=Recipes&utm_campaign=CON]
• American Dietetic Association: Low Glycemic Index Recipes [http://www.eatright.org/Public/content.aspx?id=6853]
• National Institute of Mental Health: ADHD [http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder-adhd/index.shtml]

This title was solicited by livestrong.com but didn't meet the ephemeral and confounding editorial requirements from demandmedia.com. It's exasperating to write for them, but if they accept it, it pays decently for someone who is under-employed...

Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar walking offstage

Bill O'Reilly on The View
Bill O'Reilly said, "Muslims killed us on 9/11," among other incendiary and misleading statements in the conversation. When corrected, that it was not people practicing Islam, but terrorists who misappropriated Islam, who committed a horrific crime against humanity, he would not concede. I think it was absolutely appropriate for Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar to walk off stage. Barbara Walters said something along the lines of, 'if you invite someone into your home and they offend you, you don't walk away.' I think, instead, you would politely ask the person to leave.
I suppose having BO'R as a guest on the View is simply a way to demonstrate some "fairness" in airing differing views or more likely an easy way to create drama, which creates viewership on national television. I think if I were JB or WG, I would plan to be off the day BO'R was going to be a guest. He so completely out of touch with reality, while being a master at antagonizing and incendiary statements, I would have a hard time engaging in a conversation with him. I could, however, have a conversation with someone who was ignorant and bigoted, but open to suggestion regarding Islam and Islamism.
It's always a challenge to converse with someone on an emotional topic with whom you disagree. But, as Barbara Walters said, it should be, and must be done. I do not think BO'R is the person with whom any rational person could begin that dialogue.

Juan Williams fired from NPR

Juan Williams fired from NPR
I don't think Juan Williams was asserting that his fear of people dressed in Muslim garb on airplanes was reasonable or founded in reality or something he was proud of. I think he was admitting his own ignorance regarding Muslims. JW knows that Muslims, categorically, are not terrorists. He knows that the misappropriation of Islam by a few Islamists should not reflect on the majority of Muslims. However, because of imagery often reinforced by news media, he had this irrational fear.
I think his fear is similar to being afraid of someone who looks like a "thug." Some thugs are black. Some are white. Some are Latino. I think their common thread is some visual indication of poverty and/or criminal behavior. I think white people might tend to be less fearful of another white person who looked thuggy, and similarly for black people. Whereas interracial interactions between thug and pedestrian would be more fearful. I don't think any white person is proud that he/she afraid of someone from another race simply based on the way he/she looks/is dressed. However, to say that there are never any visual commonalities among criminals is ignoring reality. I don't know how the 9/11 hijackers were dressed. They may not even have been wearing "Muslim garb" the day they committed a horrific crime against humanity that has nothing to do with the religion of Islam. Nonetheless, middle America, of which I am a member, has little contact with Muslims and remains largely ignorant about the religion as a whole. I'm sure Juan Williams, considering his expertise on the Civil Rights movement in this country in the 1960's, realizes ignorance and bigotry are congruous. He does not wish to be bigoted. Admitting that you have an ignorant, irrational thought does not make you bigoted, it makes you human.

North vs South

Delaware

SNL Facebook Spoof. Pretty funny

Go, Rangers!

Not much of a baseball fan, but I am rooting for the Rangers. I think I don't like the Yankees in the same way some folks don't like the Longhorns. But it's also just neat to see the Rangers having a good team, especially under Nolan Ryan.

Things to say/not to say to a pregnant lady

Not to say:
You look bigger than last week. (My thought: You look uglier than last week).
How ARE you? (Great, how ARE you?)
Are you glad it's a [boy or girl]? (Nope, sex change, right out of the chute).
How are you FEELING? (Great, how are you FEELING? I feel pregnant. Duh!)
Are you/How long are you going to nurse? (Until the child can ask for it and unbutton my shirt).
How much l0nger are you going to work? (I'm thinking I'll stop, now!)
You're drinking/eating [that]?! (Did you want a bite?)
Is your husband excited? (No, he's upset the baby is the milkman's child).

To say:
You look radiant/beautiful/healthy. (My thought: thank you. I feel fat, but I am glad my skin isn't pimply).
Your boobs look awesome. (I know, right!)
Hi. (Hi!)
Congratulations! (Thank you!)